Notes of a Jewpanese Nomad

As a multi-racial individual, I often encounter the expectation that I should be or must be “liberal.” This, at times, has made me want to run the other way, and just to prove people wrong, be “conservative.”

Luckily, though, I have worked very hard not to let social pressures like that decide my very personal opinions on several issues. As a result, I like to think that I have managed to remain “liberal,” “conservative,” and “middle,” depending on the issue (as I think it should be).

Now, I am a religiously observant Jew, but also strongly identify as being multi-racial and multi-cultural. I am not in to denying my Japanese self, nor depriving myself of Japanese food, or other yummy “ethnic” foods. I am very in to being Japanese, Jewish, and a citizen of the terristial beings.

In the American Jewish community, there has been some movement to try to diversify people’s idea of who is a Jew. As in, you could look many ways–not just white, but also Arab, Asian, African, black, mixed of course, etc. There are organizations devoted to doing this through outreach, education, meetings, and retreats. Great.

Many of the organizations that work the hardest at this claim to be religiously pluralistic as well. After all, they are claiming that the American Jewish community should be strengthening themselves through inclusiveness, not exclusiveness. So, what point is there in them being exclusivist. Right?

Well, in fact, often they schedule events on Shabbat that no traditionally religious Jew could attend. They in fact, trample on the basics of traditional halakha in their events, I believe, out of ignorance. But, when all the activities are inherently optional, but only the so-called “religious activities” on the program are labeled as “OPTIONAL,” you got to start thinking, what is it that they are trying to do? Are they are trying to pass on their nebulous “cultural Judaism” to their ethnically and culturally “diverse” children, with no knowledge or sense of connection to Judaism? What “culture” are the children going to carry with them then? I thought Israeli society showed us plain and simple that there is no “Jewish culture” where there is no connection or observance of some religious Jewish practice?

I am not saying that they should all be religiously observant. What I am saying though is that I think that they assume that because we are “ethnically diverse” we will be “liberal” in other ways, such as in religious observances as well. To try to claim and pass down “cultural” Judaism in a ethnically as well as culturally “diverse” Jewish context has its own very serious problems, although I won’t get into it in depth here.

To say the least, it is disappointing to see such religious disregard coming from organizations specifically aimed at bringing “diverse” Jews together, and to telling the world that we exist, in numbers much larger than some might assume.

There was one organization that is for “Jews of Colors” and did manage to bring religious pluralism in practice as well. Unfortunately, I am unsure of what has happened to it….

The media (the ones that I have kept up with and I think wield the most influence, are Time magazine and New York Times) wanted Obama to be the Democratic nominee so it ran a free campaign for him–consistently portraying Rodham Clinton in an unfavorable light.

New York Times was a little more subtle about the whole thing, but Time magazine was so blatant (and continues to be so) that it was ridiculous. When the Democratic presidential primaries were close to ending, it even started launching the anti-John McCain campaign…..

So, the media has now decided that they want Hillary Rodham Clinton to be on the ticket with Obama. In fact, that’s what they have wanted all along. So, now they are launching a fierce campaign towards that end. I guess that’s what’s going to happen.

You don’t really need to vote. You just have to sit back and watch who the media wants the nation to vote for and that person will be sworn in. How boring and ridiculous.

I’ve done this once.

And it wasn’t even a rabbi that I knew well.

Why? Because from the pulpit, he gave a great long speech about the dangers of intermarriage and how that was going to decrease the numbers of Jews.

Really annoyed at hearing this rant against intermarriage as the source of the problem again I decided to say something about it. (One of the reasons why people looked at me with amazement when in college was because they were all brain-washed to believe that all kids of intermarriage were permanantly lost to the tribe!)

Now, this rabbi’s custom was to shake hands with everyone as they left shul after a long and arduous fast. So when it came my turn, I told him, “Thank you for including me in your shul. By the way, I just wanted to let you know that I am from an intermarried couple.”

I think that sufficized to make my point. My hosts were the family of a friend from college and they knew me and they were members of the shul. Obviously, I was not some lost and confused soul who happened upon the shul.

I don’t know if that made a difference in the way the rabbi thought about children of intermarriage.

By the way, this article eloquently articulates a point that I have been making for years: That intermarriage itself is not the source of evil, but rather, that it is the symptom of indifference towards Judaism. I thank the author for writing this and publishing it in a journal. One point I would add though, is that it is good to know that in fact, perhaps because of their backgrounds, children of intermarried couples often engage with Judaism with a lot more fervour than the average two-Jewish-parented Jew when they decide to. And you know what, it’s not so uncommon.

This has been one of the wars I have been waging in my Japanese blog (you can look at this post (in Japanese) if you want to hear it most directly): That is, it’s very difficult to hear or even notice prejudiced remarks that are not directed at you.

This is one of the most infuriating things about people telling me that I am mistaken about something that I heard or saw directed at me. Granted, there is a fine line between being overly self-conscious and thinking that the whole world revolves around you (and so thinking that any comment made to a “stranger” is directed towards you) versus just noticing things when people are being slyly (or not so subtly) prejudiced.

Growing up a minority where that reality is allowed to escape so rarely though, I must say that it is slightly difficult (I am being sarcastic by saying “slightly”) not to be a little self-conscious and nervous about people looking at you weird. The “well-adjusted” person who has been so scarcely in a position where they really are minorities (I’m not talking about people who have “minority conscience” but have really not experienced living as a minority), often tells me and other minorities, “Stop being so self-conscious. People are not talking about you.”

I have heard comments like this coming from many mono-racial/ethnic parents of multiracial individuals. I have also heard this coming from Ashkenazi Jews (particularly of an older generation though not always) who hear the experience of non-Ashkenazi Jews as being made to feel uncomfortable by their Ashkenazi counterparts.

For the parents, it’s hurtful and sometimes unbelievable to them that their kids’ lived experience as a Jew or a person might be different from theirs. They also have never been in their kids’ shoes and just can’t see those stares coming from across the crosswalk, the questioning gaze of the stranger in shul, the quick back and forth of the eyes between them and their parents.

For the Ashkenazi Jews, they don’t notice the strange stares and pregnant silences directed at the “Jew of Color.” What they see is their self-image of the smiling and inviting faces that say nothing wrong and accepts with open arms, the (“honestly strange, but I’m not going to say that!!”) “stranger” amidst them. What this “do-good” “non-prejudiced” person doesn’t see is the many others who are shying away and even giving strange looks to the person who is “being welcomed with open arms.” You might be doing your best, but if you can’t tell other people to the same, if you can’t advocate for the minority that is still feeling uncomfortable, the only thing you’ve done is to raise your own status for being the courageous cool person that is able to “reach out” to the (obvious) “stranger.” Very annoying indeed to be used that way.

From my perspective, the “racist” who knows that she is a “racist” is a lot easier to deal with. And I will make full disclosure that I am “racist” too. Not in that I discriminate against people, but in that I am also prone to making certain assumptions about people based on their appearence. I also don’t know about everyone’s experience so I make mistakes in my assumptions. My ignorance can sometimes hurt someone. I know that and so I try to rain it in, but I am not always sucessful.

I am closing with a story that I hope illustrates my point better:

In a part of the country that is known as being “very liberal,” I once stood in line at a drug store behind an old black American woman. A white employee, when trying to pass by her, mistakenly brushed against her. She was angry, thinking that he had done that in purpose because she was black. As I listened to her rant, I thought, “Well, I do think that she is a little crazy, but I also know where that is coming from. She is obviously from a generation where racism against blacks were rampent and the norm. 20years ago, that might actually been a racist act. How is she to know that today in this area, that is unlikely. (Also I saw the young employee’s genuinely surprised face, which told me that he had hardly noticed that he had even touched her.) Most of life experience tells her that that was a racist act.”

Note: By the way, at my “home shul,” I haven’t really had any of these problems at all. That’s one of the reasons I feel so very comfortable there all the time.